Retro Rehash - Star Wolves: Reading Between the Lines

Isn't space cool?  It's all dark and twinkly at the same time.  Filled with stars, nebulas, comets and a whole plethora of totally radical stuff.  Of course, none of these things are as totally wonder bar as the spaceships. Now they're COOL.  Zipping around all fast and gun happy.  Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever been in space with solely peaceful intentions. There's always something that  needs pew pewing into oblivion. Whether that be evil pirates, corrupt corporations or some poor sod who happened to have cargo destined for my secret base.  It really doesn't bode well for the inhabitants of the galaxy that we're already blowing stuff up before we even get out there.

   
So, Star Wolves, what is there to say?  It's set in space for one.  Lots of space everywhere, can't get enough.  Secondly it's a mish mash of the RTS and RPG genres, so imagine Homeworld crossed with KOTOR's skills development, and lastly, it's Russian.  That part is very important to remember as it's the only way to excuse the game's most diabolical lapse. But we'll get to that. Developed by X-bow Software and published by 1C Company the setting is a fairly unoriginal one.  Space has been colonised, there's a human empire and some less than reputable corporations banging about... Oh and there are aliens but they show up later.  You play as a self-titled mercenary leading a rag-tag band of heroes through the perils of the universe, making money and claiming booty from your enemies cold wreckage.  And slowly but surely you're pulled into the machinations of just about every major player in the galaxy, all thanks to your incredible ability at wasting people in hard vacuum.  Have you noticed no one is ever looking for the best diplomat or fry cook, it's always with the killing?  More for our intergalactic neighbours to be worried about I suppose.

            

Now then, this might all seem a little dull, especially when you throw in the Ruski factor.  That being the most embarrassing voice acting known to man.  It's god-awful and single-handedly relegates the story to a very hazy plot that you follow with varying degrees of understanding.  This is then compounded by a less than (inter)stellar translation that, well, at times inflicts genuine suffering on the player.  A five year old dyslexic could have done a better job.   Understandably therefore, you might be wondering why you'd ever want to play what sounds like the gaming equivalent of an extinction level event.  To that, I offer the following.

                  

"3,2,1, FIRE!!

Star Wolves has one very big plus in it's corner, it's pretty.  True, space games tend to age more gracefully than your average workaday shooter, but a few times I was genuinely impressed with the lighting effects as a stars rays illuminated a remote space station, or I zoomed in on a gun ship as it strafed an enemy frigate.  It's one of those games that is a pleasure to look at and it's genuinely fun to mess around with the camera in pursuit of that ideal screenshot.  In a similar vein each of the ships you can buy to accentuate your force has a distinct feel.  The models offer a diversity and variation in design that offers an eclectic selection for your little armada.  Some are excellent dogfighters, fast and packing a wallop in the laser/gun department, while others are cumbersome gunships, laden down with station killing missiles and relying on cover to get the job done.  Of equal note is the soundtrack, a mashing blend of techno rock and roll that at times reminded me of the original Starcraft.  It works to smooth out the rough edges of the game, presenting another clear high production value that is lacking in the writing.  I could just imagine slamming home my cassette, pulling down the roof of my hypothetical sports car and racing off down the A1, the police in hot pursuit as the booming track taunted my would be jailers.  Now that would be fine.

                        

In a stag party, she's the man.

The choice of vessel tallies well with the myriad characters who join your mercenary band.  I found their personas kind of boring to be honest and took to giving them their own back stories and dubious accolades. For instance, resident Imperial fighter jock Viper became the lesbian lover double crossed by her heart of hearts in pursuit of the universes biggest taco.  Interestingly, I feel that the writing took a turn for the better under my guidance.  Back on point you want to choose the right mixture of character abilities and accordingly, ships, to make your little band work.  I lost a lot of money figuring this out and even now make sure the Star Wolf, which accompanies you on every mission as your carrier, has a couple of spares to hand. The Star Wolf is your home away from home and can be loaded out with bigger and better guns, shields arrays and engines.  My main complaint would be that the outward appearance of the old garbage scow never changes; the gun emplacements do but there's no other outward signs of customisation.  So boooo to that.  What the Wolf is however, is a damage sponge.  With some hefty armour and shield improvements it can reap the freaking whirlwind, but never forget can be quickly cut to pieces without fighter support.  

         

The game itself handles a little sluggishly from time to time, with drops in frame rate occurring at odd moments and commands taking that half second longer to be processed.  It's a bit of a ball ache, disrupting the rhythm of combat and accounting for a good few losses on my part.  Glitches from crashing to desktop and freezing have been reported by others, but I never had a problem even if it didn't run with the efficiency of a German rail system. Other than that the games controls are simple to learn and don't put a great  demand on your time; I might even call them intuitive to a degree, although they surely took some pointers from Homeworld and Nexus: The Jupiter Incident.  Nothing wrong with emulating the greats, mind you.

               

In Retro Rehashespect (it's a thing, trust me) when I look at Star Wolves, I see a flawed but entertaining foray into the world of space strategy.  It's never going to win any awards, being far too messy in places to barely stave off sniggers and pointing at the annual sci-fi gaming palooza, but like the fat, sensitive kid at school still has plenty to offer.  It's mechanics are sound and result in some exciting dog fights, while balancing out your squadron takes actual precision and skill.  You can't make every pilot an expert in laser warfare, otherwise who is going to fix your ship in the heat of battle?  This nuance saves Star Wolves from a brutal execution in front of the parade ground, for where it fails singularly as a narrative tale, it excels as a thinking mans game.  Impressive considering how it seems to have been written by a drunken illiterate on sabbatical from his local opium den.  So, come for the painful hilarity and stay for the complexity would be my advice.  Also, whatever you do, don't buy Star Wolves 2.  But that's another story.

Goodnight.

Retro Rehash - Blitzkrieg

One of the first things to strike me about Blitzkrieg was it's old school feel. This is in no way a negative point, if anything it endeared me to Nivial Interactive's creation faster than any fancy gimmick or graphics ever could. I still prefer the Risk style campaign maps from the original Total War games for god sake. Much of the draw came from the games relative simplicity.  Sure you fight your way through multiple campaigns and battles but there's nothing else gumming up the works. For such an example of mastication failure I point you to the Men of War series, whose attempts at character guided gameplay are woeful in the extreme. Admittedly this isn't helped by some of the worst voice acting ever committed to audio, but it feels listless all the same. Blitzkrieg gives you the units, the locales and the enemy. The rest is up to you and it's extremely
freeing.

Preparation for battle.

From the campaign screen you're presented with the theatre of combat and the missions available in that area. Many are purely optional but grant you special bonuses which can be pretty handy come the historical engagements. From better artillery pieces to heavier armoured units they can give you the edge you need to reach the next campaign area, whether that be North Africa, the fields of Europe or the vast empty reaches of the Eastern Front. At the beginning of each battle you select your unit composition and move out, perhaps accentuated by extra forces on certain maps but with the core of your army held together by your elite units. These can  gain promotions and as such become far more effective on the battlefield.  By the end of the Allied campaign my artillery had become a force for mass destruction, raising enemy held positions like wrathful and very accurate gods.

Given that there is no resource gathering in Blitzkrieg you have to rely on your own strategic savvy to preserve any operation.  Charging headlong at enemy defences will usually result in a slaughter as hidden anti tank guns and enemy trenches wreak havoc with your forces.  This is where artillery and air power become key for both the spotting and removal of opposition units. From calling in Heinkel bombers to flatten an area to recon planes to spot for your field pieces the use of air power cannot be underestimated.  If anything these two forces in conjunction can win entire battles for you, your tanks and infantry moving into enemy positions all but unopposed.  This is sometimes a little irksome as engagements can devolve into high explosive slanging matches, so it's important to choose your moments to commit your ground troops, usually after a heavy bombardment has exposed a weakness in the enemy line.  Anything else is tantamount to suicide.  Be smart people.

One of the coolest additions Blitzkrieg brings to the table is the ability to lay down defences such as mines, tank traps and trenches to frustrate your opponent. Given that almost everything from bridges to forests are destructible this comes in handy when you need to secure a flank against a counterattack in a decimated area. There's nothing like watching enemy armour flounder against your AT guns and infantry trenches before launching your own into the fray. One of the most important realisations I have had when it comes to Blitzkrieg however, is that it is a game which relies heavily on you to take the reins. It's very easy to dig in and lob shells across the map rather than taking the fight to the enemies front door. Some of this is the failure of the game itself, with ground units feeling too fragile to commit for fear of losing them for no tangible gain. I know I wouldn't attack a village before softening it up with extreme levels of ordinance, but it's a bit frustrating at times when the defenders hold a clear and unexplained advantage. A few times having engaged enemy tanks in the open with my own I've been baffled by the slaughter that has ensued, despite the relative equality or superiority of my own armour. It seems that in trying to make you think your way through problems the designers might have upped the difficulty a little too far, relegating some units to paper tigers in all but name.

Meet the gun line.

Now moving onto more technical issues, hailing from back in 2003 Blitzkrieg's isometric terrain and graphics stand up under modern scrutiny surprisingly well, the shifting weather system being of particular note. There's nothing more inconvenient than a sandstorm invading the map just as your forces advance to evict an enemy anti tank position. The explosions and flashes of guns are credible if not all defining, the explosive crump of artillery being my personal favourite amongst the game's 350 units. It should be noted that not all of these are useful, with infantry demonstrating themselves suited to a defensive role only, although their guns sound convincing even if their effects are negligible.

So what have we learned class? Firstly, that Blitzkrieg requires you to use your noggin. If you don't you'll find yourself frustrated and very, very dead. Secondly, the AI is a little passive but holds a massive advantage in defence. You'll find that some of these advantages shift to you when in the same position, but that the computer is far more effective at employing ground units to punish your lines than you are. I have to say that while this can be annoying it does offer up a real challenge and so should be forgiven in the spirit of cerebral stimulation. And lastly, it's fun, really fun, if you can accept the finite resources and capabilities you're given and use them to out think the enemy. It's particularly rewarding come missions end if you're still in possession of your core units while the German or Allied armour smolders in the background. Blitzkrieg is smart gaming if you want it to be, so give it a go and if it's not for you, there's always Halo Wars.

Retro Rehash - Wing Commander 3: Heart of the Tiger

From the opening full motion sequence I knew I was in for something special with Wing Commander III: Heart of the Tiger.  Whether it was the appearance of Mark Hamill, the movie style dialogue or just the thrill of seeing Luke Skywalker with a moustache, I'm not sure.  It was likely a product of all three.  But in any event I had found my newest addiction, the fix for which I would spend hours pining and then many more hours strapped to my chair with a bucket over my head and a badly painted starscape mounted over my monitor. The third installment in Chris Robert's Wing Commander series, Heart of the Tiger was released way back in 1994, arguably the golden age of space sims and chronicles the story of one Colonel Christopher Blair (Mark Hamil).  Having been raging for the past thirty years the war with the Kilrathi Star Empire is going from bad to worse as the Confederation is pushed to the breaking point.  Stationed aboard the TCS Victory, you and your rag tag band of misfits, lunatics and xenophobes must help to stem the tide and turn the tables on the Kilrathi, while forming lasting friendships and animosities, all of which are rendered in full motion video.  Now, I know what you're thinking.  FMV's are bad.  They're awful.  They're the product of all that is evil in the world, they may even have links to Fascism.  To this I say, you're right, just not this time.
       

"I'm an actor, a real actor.  I'd give that Red Alert Tanya a go mind you."

With a huge budget, a professional screenplay, A-list actors such as Malcolm McDowell, Jon Rhys-Davis, and Tom Wilson Heart of the Tiger is possibly the only example (minus Wing Commander 4: The Price of Freedom) of a well blended FMV/Game experience.  For while that other game of FMV fame Command and Conquer can claim the use of FMV's, they're more tongue in cheek and not of the same calibre.  Wing Commander is meant to be a movie and a video game while C&C is a video game with FMV components.  Anyhow, I constantly found myself hankering after the next cutscene, the next character interaction.  For much like in the far newer Mass Effect series you can get to know and develop friendships with your crew mates.  The dialogue options are boiled down to two responses, such is the complication of acting out every branching conversation tree, but it demonstrates how detailed Chris Robert's creation really was.  These weren't just characters who you blindly followed, you had choices, you decided how things panned out.  And this was way back in 1994.
                 

The Arrow: A need for speed!

Kilrathi Strakha: Stealthy SOB's.

So having gushed over the FMV's lets move onto the meat of the game, the combat.  As otherwise we're just watching a film, a very good film but a film none the less.  Simply put, it's excellent.  From the cockpit design, the selection of both enemy and allied star fighter models and the actual learning curve when pacing your weapons fire to strike the enemy, it's all very impressive.  I particularly enjoyed being able to strafe the hangar deck or hull of an enemy carrier in the Arrow, it's slide ability allowing you to deal maximum damage along a capital class vessels entire length.  It makes for an extremely cool and immersive experience, taking both skill and balls of steel to pull off without getting vaped, especially when one misstep will find you buried in a bulkhead or crashing into a parked Kilrathi fighter.  I did that a fair few times and ended up sucking hard vacuum, for all the two seconds it would have taken my fuel cells to ignite and incinerate my body.  As we've come to expect from our space sims the array of commands and controls available are all in attendance, from being able to order your wingman to cover your ass or shunting power to those rapidly weakening shields.  Nowadays, well in more modern games such as Starlancer and Freespace we take these as a given, but it's always worth remembering how seminal Wing Commander was.  How much like Half Life it defined an entire genre and what we as gamers expect as standard.  If you play Heart of the Tiger just like any other game you'll still love it, but taken as a benchmark in video game history you can appreciate its nuances all the more.
 

Prepare to die... Again.... And Again.

So we've had the worship, the fanatical displays of sacrifice to Robert's creation and now it's time for the harder truths.  The wee failures here and there.  The first and most striking to me, perhaps due to a modern perspective more than genuine flaw, is the feeling of repetitiveness.  This is far more prevalent in the earlier parts of the game as the story slowly builds up a head of steam, as without a definite direction to be following it begins to feel like you're jumping all over the place, blasting some bad guys at various way points and then buggering off.  As the game progresses this does abate, with more capital class ships being thrown into the mix and missions linking more tangibly with the overall story.  For while protecting a convoy of freighters can be fun, it doesn't plug into the experience in the same way as punching a hole through a Kilrathi blockade as to allow the Victory to escape.  Maybe I'm being picky as blending FMV's with game play seamlessly is doubtless difficult, but then again some greats do take their sweet time getting going.  The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings, Babylon 5 and the Mighty Morphing Power Rangers to name but a few.  That show had less than nothing before Tommy showed up, and then we got nothing but gold.  It should also be noted that on any given mission you can only take the grand total of one wing man with you.  This in itself is a bit limiting, especially given the general incompetence of some of your co-pilots, (cough, Flint).  As I mentioned above however, this could be a failure of the time as we've come to expect super-high-class rendered-bullshit powered multiplayer in our games.   It'd be nice to have a little more backup though.
         
As always with any review you have to straddle the line between being informative and giving away every detail which defines what you're reviewing.  It can be hard, for how else are you to get people to understand exactly how amazing or truly terrible something is without being specific?  In such a vein I can say only this about Wing Commander 3: Heart of the Tiger.  In my humble opinion it is one of the greatest games I have ever played, and I don't say that lightly.  Granted the only other game I've played is Cricket Revolution, but I learned a lot from that experience.  Some of which can only be properly analysed with the help of a seasoned mental health professional.  So there you go, slow starter, excellent game play, movie style cutscenes.  It's an instant classic.  Now play it.

And just in case you're still unsure, heres a trailer that will blow your socks off.  Or at least mildly impress you.

Retro Rehash - Star Wars Republic Commando: Fragging Tinnies

Beneath my layers of cynicism, disappointment and burning resentment, I am and always will be, a Star Wars fan.  It's in my nature.  No matter how many half-arsed, poorly produced, badly written pieces of fierfek Lucas authorises I will stand firm, albeit embarrassed, by my universe.  It makes no sense really. It's the product of my inner fanatic, nay, my inner religiosity.  I've grown up with Star Wars and I'll be damned if I'll be run out of town by the blatant money grabbing which has come to epitomise everything about the series.  I mean, come on, Oshaka Tano?  Really George, do you hate us that much?  But on top of my blind adoration sits a nugget of hope that every once in a while still glints, is still capable of rousing my wounded loyalty.  A small gust of wind clears the ashes of so many cash ins and I can feel that Star Warsiness again.
             

Clear the way Delta.

In Star Wars: Republic Commando I found a respite from Jar Jar Binks, Anakin Skywalker, droids cracking wise and the oh dear god pain of it all.  In a sound choice, Lucasarts took this foray into the universe in a completely different direction, a grittier direction, than we have seen before.  Bypassing Jedi, Sith and the whole galactic wide shabang you are thrown into the fire that is the Clone Wars with nothing but your Decce, wits and three man team of elite Commandos.  Lead animator David Bogan said he wanted to "focus in on the military aspect of Star Wars," and I think he and his team did a pretty fine job.  From blasting doors, slicing terminals and altogether behaving like unstoppable badasses, you get to take the war to the Separatists like never before.  That isn't to say the game doesn't have it's flaws, but we can get to those later.
                   
Opening with the battle of Geonosis as seen in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones, you progress through three separate campaigns in varying locales.  Through the bowels of a ghost ship fighting off Trandoshian slaver scum, the lofty heights of the Wookie homeworld, Kashyyk and the droid foundries of Geonosis.  Each has it's own distinct flavour and never feels like a rehash of what's gone before.  It speaks volumes such detail was put into a genre that often suffers from the same tired and recycled scenery all executed with minimal effort.  Actually, the entire game enjoys a level of attention not seen in a Star Wars game since Knight's of the Old Republic, with everything from the sound to the command hud being designed to a tee.  Utilising Foley Sound, originally designed for film, Republic Commando specialises in bringing the whole package.  Creaking armour and the approach of enemies coincides with the visual presentation with natural precision.  Would you like to know more? Take a look below.

                                   

Sniper Rifles, AKA Precision Shotguns 

On the subject of realism, the command interface for your squad is deserving of special mention. Whether you're ordering your men to take firing positions to fend off a particularly nasty Sep ambush, or to slice a door for rapid entry, at no point did I feel handicapped by the system.  Using a collection of five keys you can keep your squad under control and firmly on the objective.  Thinking about it, my buddies Sev, Fixer and Scorch are probably the best NPC allies I've ever had, even having the nonce to beat off an attack before coming to rescue my sorry shebs.  On  many an occasion I found myself embarrassingly incapacitated and being chastised for my gung ho attitude while being revived.  It was a humbling experience being told off by an NPC that was actually right  for a change. It has to be said that Republic Commando isn't a game in which you can readily run and gun, but nor does it suffer the shame of cover-based game play.  You can order your men to take certain positions and you can feel free to shield yourself behind a wall, but don't for a second think you'll be cowering there for long.  It's all about the action baby.  With your Decce ion blaster and it's multiple attachments you'll be raising hell and fighting for your life.  Choosing which attachment to use in any given situation does require a bit of a knack. For instance, you'd better be saving those armour piercing grenades for the droid heavies and not wasting them on your bob standard battle variants, even if they do clear a room faster than a Nemoidian tax collector.  My personal favourite was the sniper attachment, packing one hell of a wallop and accuracy all in one neat package.

But just as the Republic are efficient and roll all their killing implements into one, the other races in the game possess their own unique styles and quirks.  The Trandoshians are projectile based, nasty and look like they've been put together with all the care and attention warranted in your average  Toydarian junk store.  Meanwhile the Geonosian beam weapon is a clicking, clacking, breakable looking thing that belays it's deadliness.  My only real complaint is that the basic Decce is unsuited for killing anything tougher than a battle droid with any ease and lacks the punch to stick it to heavier opponents.  So balls to the wall you'd better have a thermal detonator handy or it's lights out for Delta Squad.

Trandoshian Weaponry: Good as new with a slap of paint.

Having complimented the game to within an inch of worship there are a few problems that need addressing. First and most importantly of all, it feels a bit short.  I ran through it in about eight hours and while this is standard fair for a shooter I was kind of hoping that the Lucasarts team would have gone that extra parsec like they had throughout.  I was genuinely disappointed when I reached the end credits, although that could just be a sign of wanting more of a good thing.  Also, while the selection of weapons is eclectic it's not that vast, with about six pieces besides those which are attachments for your standard Decce.  This may seem a small gripe, but it would have been fun to really put those Commando skills to the test with a more blistering arsenal and customisable load out.
                     
So coming to the end Star Wars: Republic Commando is a first rate, standout shooter that does almost everything right.  The detail is truly fantastic and keeps the player immersed in a universe which seems genuinely alive, well until you start killing things.  It demonstrates that there is still mileage left in the Star Wars engine if the time and effort is invested properly, and not on anymore drivel that is meant to convince us Anakin Skywalker is Darth Vader.  Delta Squad are a fine addition to the universe fully deserving of their place in the lore, alongside Han Solo, the Death Star and even Jabba the Hutt.  As surely as Republic Commando deserves a place in your video game collection.

Mass Effect 3 Extended Cut: Rage

I'm sorry Bioware, NO! NO, NO, NO! Having only purchased Mass Effect 3 recently I'm a bit behind the times; as such however, I'd already heard the phenomenally bad press it's finale had attracted. So I'm not here to bash on the bear bones, kick in my crotch embarrassment that is the original game. But the fix job Bioware released to patch the problem. The problem being of course that different coloured lights and three shitty choices do not an ending make. You see I've looked around and there are mixed opinions on the DLC, some hate it, others like it and some are just happy that an extended cut exists. That their beloved universe will not have to suffer the shame of attending the sci-fi franchise annual wine tasting with such failure tucked between it's deflated butt cheeks. And interestingly enough, it is with these people that I have the biggest beef. With whom I would like to engage in some friendly cajoling before I introduced them to the pointy end of my omni tool. Why you ask? Why humble reviewer, are you in such an uncontrollable rage? Because you don't pat a dog on the head for crapping outside after it's already shat on the carpet, that's why!

Don't get me wrong, it's commendable that having whored themselves out to the dark forces of EA that Bioware could comprehend the idea of consumer dissatisfaction, but it doesn't make up for the original failure. It just knocks a few years off the sentence and I'll be damned if they get to come out of this with an unsullied rectum. Sure, they've made the endings longer and filled in some rather large plot holes: like how did your team make it to the Normandy and why do the Mass Relays explode in every ending sequence? But it doesn't change the fact that the conclusion, the original upon which these fixes were based, plain sucked. I mean, wow, in pretty much every option you are given, minus the bonus were Shepherd can survive, you have to kill your character. Whether you destroy, control or merge with the Reapers you pretty much kick the proverbial bucket. And all I can ask is, why? Why Bioware are you so intent on forcing us to die? Do you hate us that much? Do you feel that your writing staff is so shoddy they can only make something dramatic by killing a character many have invested three games worth of effort into? It makes no sense; why can't there be a happy ending; why can't we CHOOSE to live? As this is a video game that, despite ignoring it's previous incarnations when it suited, champions the player as master of his/her own destiny. And don't even get me started on the Galactic Readiness scale, which again fails to have any effect on the outcome of the game even though it was its entire sodding focus. I mean, these are the people you want to thank for the extended cut? A company who barely seemed to understand what was happening in their own franchise?

I am raging, I appreciate that, but I think Bioware's slap job is beyond the realms of acceptable behaviour. Releasing an incomplete product and then fixing it is, well, just plain dickish. If anything they should have received a curt "good" from the fan base as the extended cut was humbly handed over and been sent to sit in the corner and think about what they'd done. As even with the DLC I still felt that the entire synthetic-organic paradigm was as weak as they came, as such issues were not central to the saga. They played their part, especially with the Geth and Quarrian story line, but it feels tacked on in the end. Like the writers couldn't be bothered and instead through out the old, Order vs Chaos bit. It seemed overly contrived, how the Reapers had to trim the galactic hedge every 50,000 years to avoid some vague synthetic rebellion and ultimate organic extermination. If anything by uniting the Geth and the Quarrians this entire theory falls to pieces faster than your average Kevin Sorbo series.

Anyway I am beginning to drift a tad here, so lets round up. Bioware did bad. Bad Bioware! Don't do that anymore! Then again with Dragon Age 3 on the way maybe I'll be back again this time next year, only a lot drunker and still trying to figure out what a Turian/Human baby would look like. I love you Garrus, too bad Bioware said we couldn't be together. If only there was a way for a computer geek, playing a female character and romancing an alien bird man could make it work in this crazy universe, but I don't see it happening anytime soon.

P.S - Yes the child ending is ridiculous, stilted and completely out of touch with the franchise, but I think that's been pretty well covered already. I'm all out of rage people.

Control Ending
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhVhBz4ANj4

Synthesis Ending
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCU3kl1vfiw

Destroy Ending
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWhlU5xM2E0&feature=relmfu

In Memoriam: Tali'Zorah, a Footnote in Video Game Storytelling

I've never been the biggest fan of moral choice systems. As a rule I avoid their annual parade, social mixer and jiggly ball tournament in favour of a whiskey on the rocks and some manly air guitar. The problem I've always found is that no matter how hard a studio tries, they invariably end up making a parody version of actual morality. A cut and dry set up where decisions are this or that with no in between. Because in between would be boring I suppose, who wants realism in their games anyway? Being a champion of evil or good is the best that you can hope for. Due to this, the only way to retain my interest is through good, solid storytelling. By making the decisions I make seem tangible. As while I can control only the extremes of my virtual soul, maybe I can make more of an impact in the virtual world. Maybe, just maybe I'll matter and at the same time make me question my decisions, bypassing the messy moral game system and communicating directly with my own grey matter. Now, having played many an RPG, from SWTOR 2 to Dragon Age: Origins, I have learned not to expect such dramatic self determination. If I kill I'm bad, if I find away out of the situation without killing, I'm good. Ring a bell?



Tali'Zorah

So you can imagine my shock, my surprise when in the conclusion to Bioware's sci-fi oddysey I felt myself regretting, nay, fully questioning myself and my decisions. If you haven't completed Mass Effect 3 or generally like to retain some mystery in your life, this is the point where you look away. Go twiddle your thumbs or play on the motorway. Anyway, so the story goes while pulling the universe together in one final effort to defeat the intergalactic machine menace, the Reapers, you must make a variety of tough and at times branching decisions. This in itself of course is not where the gut wrenching doubt emerges from, but it sets the scene rather nicely.  As you encounter friends, old and new from across the fiction of Mass Effect's past video game forays, you begin to realise that your priorities may have changed, that they no longer coincide with your former comrades in arms.




My allies, for the greater good!

Some will betray you, others drift away and a few will end up as blood on your hands. It is in one such instance that my doubt finds root. Enter the Geth, the Quarians and 200 years of conflict. Their war is coming to an end and you must choose who to grant the right of life, and who to in the process let wither on the vine. Entire civilizations in the palm of your hand. Again, this in itself without any personal connection could have fallen flat on it's face, just a bunch of inconsequential pixels blinking out of existence. But thanks to one Tali'zorah you seal not only the fate of an entire species, but your friend as well. It's an interesting question, what would you sacrifice to hold onto those you loved? In this instance, could you let countless billions possibly die all for one individual? I chose the billions, I aligned with the Geth and I watched the Migrant Fleet go down in flames. Just so many pixels. In the process however, I destroyed a character with whom I had travelled the galaxy and like you do with some well written characters, cared about. It was a bittersweet moment and one that I would like to see more in modern gaming. As an interactive medium without the support of good storytelling we're really just killing time and possibly improving our hand eye co-ordination. So we need more Tali'zorahs, we need more heart wrenching moments as otherwise, what's the point? We're just feeding studios to pump out more of the same. So I salute you Tali'zorah and I truly am sorry. But the needs of the many... Well, you know the rest.

 

Transformers: War for Cybertron, Restoring My Faith in Computer Generated Violence

I have to say that lately I've found myself in a bit of a funk when it comes to shooters. It's almost like the romance has gone from the relationship, the love that we once felt for one another turning stale. Gone is the whimsy of the 90's and early 2000's, with their Quakes and their Red Factions, their Dooms and unending streams of World War 2 imitators. Remember when dogs could drive back in the original Medal of Honour?  Now that was gaming. Sadly however, we now live in an age of Kane and Lynch, Gears of War and loathe most of all, Call of Duty. Don't get me wrong, these are all very popular franchises but between the cover mechanics and blatant money grabbing it's hard to feel anything but disappointed in the games industry. They're the abusive spouse, putting us down and taking our money, while we continue to love them despite the misgivings in our gut. So when I picked up Transformers: War for Cybertron at the poultry price of £3.75, I can't say I was expecting all that much. Michael Bay had seen to that. But now it's ten hours of play later and I have to say, well done Half Moon Studios.

Megatron, "Death to the Autobots!"

In a wise turn they ignored the diabolical offerings of the silver screen and stuck to the cartoon of my youth. A semi ridiculous, over the top story about transforming robots battling across the stars. On one side, lead by the heroic Optimus Prime stands the Autobots, the other, Megatron's evil Decepticons. They have changed a few things here and there, for instance Megatron no longer turns into a pistol, as well, it was kind of stupid to begin with. But at it's heart, War for Cybertron stays faithful, expanding the universe and giving us a look into the history of the conflict that started it all. Ever wondered how Starscream betrayed the Autobots, or Optimus succeeded to the rank of Prime? It's really a lot of fun and quite the nostalgia trip. I mean sure, the dialogue is kind of corny and the story a little 2 dimensional, but that's what Transformers is all about. It's not masterpiece theatre but nor is it meant to be.

Cybertronian Optimus

Beyond the simple thrill of playing as my childhood favourites each of the Autobots and Decepticons have been brought to life with great detail. The fluid movements between transformations mirroring their cartoon counterparts to a tee. There really is nothing like jumping off a platform only to turn mid air into a deadly fighter jet. It can take some getting used to, when and where to switch between vehicle and robot, but once you have it down the sparks sure do fly. Also it must be noted that as this is pre earth, or G1 depending how in the know you are, the models aren't identical to those found in the series, but they retain enough of their personality as to be instantly recognisable. It obviously wouldn't have made sense to have Optimus rolling around Cybertron as a Kenworth truck. Not that it wouldn't have been entertaining to see.

The game is divided along the faction lines, with half the game dedicated to the Decepticons and the other, the Autobots. This may seem a little off putting, that to play the story in order you have to go through one campaign first, but with the option to choose which you play and the story being fairly straightforward nothing is really lost, there are no spoilers to ruin the ride. Simply put, Megatron wants a weapon, he gets the weapon and then you have to fight Megatron to stop him destroying Cybertron with the weapon. Arguably the most succinct synopsis of a game ever written. Just the simple nature of the story is a breath of fresh air, with no ham handed attempts at drama making their way into the script and stealing focus from the action.

Do you like my gun?  I vandalised it myself.

On a graphical front the game gives a solid performance that while not stunning, doesn't disappoint either. This can be put down to the games multiple ports, so if you feel like blaming anyone for it's lack of Crysis beauty, take it up with the console jockeys. Cybertron comes alive as the Transformers home world, a foreign construct of steel and rivets that manages to possess an organic quality at the same time. It has been criticised for lacking an expansive, Dulux colour pad design scheme, but I feel that in this instance it can be forgiven. There are only so many shades of grey after all, but with some interesting level design and plenty of action you'll barely notice. You'll be far too busy slaughtering your way through your robotic foes, whoever they may be. And I have to say, that while the selection of weapons to hand aren't mind blowing, they do have that oompf factor required to really get stuck in. From oversized EMP Shotguns to Neutron Blasters there's enough to keep you killing with glee for many an encounter. You can even rip mounted turrets from the ground and heft them around 80's action hero style, I wet myself a little at that.  The melee component is boiled down to whacking whatever gets in your way with, for example, a bloody great axe, depending on who you are playing as.  But I felt it's relative simplicity was and is compensated for by the myriad of special abilities you can throw out to thwart your opponents.  My personal favourite being the energy shield deployable by Warpath, which is extremely handy in a firefight where you're taking a pounding.

So to conclude, Transformers: War for Cybertron satisfies an itch for no holds barred, shooty fun. It doesn't demand a great deal in return, just a steady trigger finger and an appreciation for robot on robot violence. The fact that it fills in some gaps in the Transformers law is a gift to fans of the series, but it doesn't require any foreknowledge on the players part to enjoy. The camp, over the top bad guys and overpowered weapons see to that. It is, therefore, everything it says on the tin and well worth a look, if only to escape the repetitiveness of modern shooters and their equally meaningless characterisations. Autobots, roll out!

Godhood, Sure Ain't All It's Cracked Up To Be

 Remember how when you were a kid you'd smush ants by the dozen, pull the wings off flies and generally demonstrate sociopath like tendencies which disturbed your parents no end? Well, thankfully the game industry sure does, providing us with a never ending stream of fantastical ways to kill, maim and otherwise destroy our way across a plethora of worlds, time periods and fantastical settings. And arguably the greatest genre for those daemons of the insect world is the RTS, where one can literally play god. Bringing entire continents to heel, raising cities and courting the death of thousands at a whim they really allow us to play with our inner despot. You'll never find Democracy: The Game sitting on your shelf, I can tell you that much (I have recently learned there is a game called Democracy, I stand chastened). Now, Black and White sought to open up the idea of simple god hood, of good and evil. It was all very moral and didn't reward the player all that well if he or she were more devilishly inclined. In Black and White Two the record has been set straight, you can be evil yet still build a beautiful city or be good and indulge in a little murder and pillage. It is an extremely well designed piece of software. That does not mean however, that it is a good game.

Point and click, damn being a soldier is easy.

 You see Black and White has always had the habit of promising more than it can deliver. The freedom exalted so much in the original never really materialised in my view.  Don't get me wrong it was an interesting premise but it wasn't as revolutionary as it was made out to be. Quite frankly I found it a little dull, call me a philistine, but it just didn't grab me by the throat and make me take notice. Much of that I felt was due to a singular lack of control, that my godliness was dependent too much on simple influence. I'm a god after all, surely I have the right to choose exactly how much I want to interfere with the little ants I call worshippers. So in Black and White 2 this was tweaked somewhat, now you can make your followers into the conversion war machine you've always wanted. An unstoppable hoard chanting your name and burning the heretics! But there is one slight problem in all of this rabble rousing. The game mechanics themselves. They're shit.

I was going to come up with a long winded and exceptional metaphor to fully help you comprehend how bad they are, but then I thought plain English did the job better. From lacking a drag selection function to having no upgrade system the entire set up feels flawed. If anything it feels like an RTS's for dummies. This is justified by your being a god, not a general on the battlefield like say, in Medieval Total War. Instead it just comes across as amateurish, the hefty number of units you can command becoming a burden as you have to select them one at a time. There is just too much micro management with too few controls to do the job. This is then compounded by an inferior AI that behaves in a manner one would expect from the original Age of Empires, for when a city or town is defended by a god a couple of units and a catapult really ain't going to cut it. There is no feeling that you can lose so the game lacks any sense of gravitas. It puts paid to the grand ideal of god hood by making it into a chore that has to be done, not a desperate struggle for ascension.

Impressive?  Imagine building dozens.  I was a weary god by the end of it all. 

If you're a more peaceable sort you can convert through awing the surrounding settlements with your mighty city building. I actually quite enjoyed this facet of the game, for there are plenty of different buildings to construct and how you decide to build your city has an effect on the happiness of your people. Are you going to build them beautiful villas or squalid huts, enough of which together will form depressing slums. Also, there's nothing like a good torture pit to vent your frustrations, it's all very satisfying. It can however become a little much, your godly abilities being judged on how much your people like that new temple you just built, rather than how much they worship you in it. Also, taking over the map through conversion alone is a ball ache and becomes repetitive all too quickly, forcing you to rely on your men at arms. I imagine this was the point, to force you to choose exactly how dedicated you are to one path or another, but the game seems intent on pushing you into the grey area and punishing you for making a definite choice.

So pretty, but not much else besides.

The devil is in the details, for while Lionhead Studios did a fair job with the graphical presentation, it is pretty to be sure, they failed miserably in the menu design department. It's little niggling things like having to scroll through each building to find what you want or having to construct each building in turn, it's all a bit irritating, especially when you're building the thousandth house. I have to say that that the only menu attachments I found genuinely effective were those relating to your creature, your avatar on earth. You can select him to be a builder one moment or a warrior the next, with the warning that leaving him under these commands for too long will turn him into a mindless automaton. It's perhaps the one facet of the game were the simplicity of it actually enhances the experience, instead of feeling like the Sims Do Godhood. It just feels patronising at times, that in trying to make the game accessible Lionhead also made it repetitive and stupid.

  So to conclude, Black and White 2 is not a seminal moment in gaming history. It's too casual and lacks true depth, for while it may entertain on a basic, pick up and play level, it doesn't immerse one in what it is to be a god. At the most it's an RTS with a few gimmicks. I will admit that the moral system is effectively developed, however the game mechanics, the two facets of war or awe don't mesh as well as they should. You can't play this game as a do-gooder because it becomes plain dull, while the combat mechanics are none existent. There's no strategy other than who has more men, materials, or in the players case, godly abilities. Excellent for defence, but poor at range. You can't even aim properly, something I find wholly unforgivable. So if you'd like a casual outing as a micro managing deity with all the abilities of a city foreman, be my guest. Otherwise chuck it in a draw and play a proper RTS, as this sure ain't it.

Retro Rehash - Stalker: Welcome to the Zone

You know what I really love about the Zone? It isn't its radioactive death traps, bandits, weapons, artifacts or chilly Russian air. It's not the wonderment of watching an emission tear the sky asunder or a mutant cut down an inch from your face. It's the lawlessness, the feeling of being the composite master of one's destiny. Now, I know what you're thinking, RPG's have been around for years, MMO's let you live a virtual life online etc etc. To the first I say, find me a setting more bleak and frankly downright interesting than the Zone. Your brain is straining tangibly at the thought. As for the second, why the hell would I want such an experience as wandering the desolate Chernobyl wasteland ruined by a bunch of strangers? A couple of friends maybe, but I'll be damned if any snot nosed thirteen year old is going to interrupt me wiping out a bloodsucker den to tell me to "go fuck myself." You want that, get back on your Xbox.

Kill it, kill it now!

Now, where was I? Ah yes, the Zone. Having recently completed S.T.A.L.K.E.R: Shadow of Chernobyl and Call of Pripyat I am currently chocker full of admiration for the designers at GSC Game World. I don't get drawn into games lightly, and this has got to count as a full blown addiction. I'm practically ambushing Monolith fighters in my sleep, which helps explain the state of my bedroom somewhat. Maybe the Zone indulges my own antisocial attitudes, allowing me to wander to the march of my own drum but there's something fundamentally entertaining about the notion. The world feels real, much helped by the game engine's ability to maintain up to 1000 npc players in an unscripted environment. They are, in effect, living their own lives and following their own missions. So, do you help the group of Stalkers under fire from bandits or just walk on by? Is it in your interest, do you care for your standing with any given faction? It's just feels good knowing you're not walking some preset path through the game. It's very liberating.

There is of course a primary story line in both games, but they always felt a little flimsy to me, especially in Call of Pripyat. I basically did the story missions once I'd exhausted the side quests in an area, for to be honest I had very little interest in why the helicopters had crashed or with what the military was doing poking around the Zone. If anything, I'd say that the main plot was a simple vehicle meant to give you some direction but still let you do your own thing. In this regard, it is easy to understand the underwhelming narrative, it was never meant to be the central part of either game anyway. It would have been nice if they'd both been a little tighter, but I wouldn't sacrifice the Zone's uniqueness in pursuit of it.

WARNING! May be hazardous or give you super powers!

 
While playing S.T.A.L.K.E.R you will quickly come to learn that artifacts are pretty handy to have in a bind. They can make you into demi-gods, be traded for a fist full of cash, or irradiate you in my case. Took me a few minutes to figure that one out. Suffice as to say, I'd wind up dead in the Zone faster than a Bandit making friends with the smart end of my shotgun, in reality. Anyway, getting back on point, artifacts exist to create a genuine interest in the Zone rather than it just being a hide out for criminals and a point of interest to scientists. Much like during the gold rush, they act as the prize in this Western style backwater drawing in every type of individual you can imagine. Corrupt military, mercenaries, Stalkers, scientists and idealists. Who wouldn't want a chunk of rock that can help you resist bullets, run faster or in rare cases, regenerate. When I got that particular item, I sold it. So not everyone I guess.

I have to admit that while in Shadow of Chernobyl I was artifact mad, in Call of Pripyat I was far less so primarily due to the increased difficulty of acquiring and equipping them. When I needed a quick influx of money I'd brave the wilds and come back with a few choice pieces, but found that overall, I could do just fine without them. I even snubbed the vast majority of quests were retrieving a specific artifact was required, but that's just how I roll. I made a small fortune in equipment; why diversify?

Meet the wildlife, please do not feed the animals.

The thing that both games have in common is their eerie, lifeless quality. Heading back to base as night sets in, the hollow eyes of buildings staring you down while around you, the natives are waking up. And I have to say, they ain't friendly. From rabid mutant dogs, to psychic Controllers, the Zone is arguably more awake in the early morn than any other. It's also a lot more dangerous and outright scary. There's nothing like pumping your way across the swamps, reeds high above your head, and then, boo! Out of nowhere pops a mutant ready to munch on your brain, fast food style. It gets to the point where you have some pretty frayed nerves and a jumpy trigger finger to boot. At one point, in the middle of a night time gun battle I unloaded half a clip into an enemy silhouette, only to find it to be a well.  That's right, a hole in the ground filled with water. Paranoia can get the better of anyone out here.
                                                                                         
                                                                                                           

"I found him this way, honest!"

Speaking of trigger fingers, remember how earlier I was extolling the magical lawlessness of the Zone? Well, no Wild West is complete without it's selection of weapons. From AK's to automatic shotguns and under slung grenade launchers to rail guns, the order of firepower is very impressive. Personally, in both outings, I preferred a trusty AK-74 with a scope for long range work. It wasn't the best gun in the game by far, but it just felt Stalkerish. The kind of weapon that would be in abundance in a place like the Zone. It saved my life on hundreds of occasions, and may have been complicit in a few of my shadier dealings. There's a reason I nicknamed my weapon Old Dependable, and a small part of it has nothing to do with my mental health.

I could ramble on for several more pages about S.T.A.L.K.E.R, invariably boring you to death with every minute detail of my play through, but that would be an injustice. I'd be taking up valuable time which you could be using to play S.T.A.L.K.E.R, buy S.T.A.L.K.E.R or just think about S.T.A.L.K.E.R. So, I shall let you go now, to do whatever you like. It might even not be S.T.A.L.K.E.R related, but I doubt it.

Retro Rehash - Future Cop: A Hommage

You know what I think of when I see the police walking the beat? It isn't how they embody our lawful society and all that is good and pure within our democratic system. It isn't even how funny their big hats are. No, it's three words. "Crowd, control, situation." You see, way back in my formative years my family finally bought one of those crazy-fangled Personal Computers and with it came a whole host of new and exciting possibilities, or video games as I came to know them. As such with my pocket money I traveled to Electronic Boutique and purchased the game which most appealed to the mind of an eight year old boy, with a front cover sporting a fiery background and a mech letting loose. As I would come to notice just before I handed over my meager savings, this was Future Cop, and it would change my life. For this was no Mario or simple football game, rendered on my ailing Super Nintendo.  This was violent and positively gleeful in it's execution. By modern standards it's probably fairly antiquated, but back then it was the single greatest discovery of my short life so far.

Not your regular bobby.

In the year 2098 urban warfare is rife, terrorists, drug lords, mutants, cyborgs, they got it. So, it's up to you as X1-Alpha, to serve, protect and perhaps most importantly, survive, while bringing justice in all it's destructive forms to the scum of L.A. Who, might I add, are packing some serious heat. This translates into you choosing your weapons load outs, watching the mission briefs and going to town on whichever organisation has been ignorant enough to warrant your attentions. The level design is fairly linear but enjoys a solid size and variance in styles, from battling your way across Venice Beach to purging the mutant infested hell hole that is La Brea Tar Pits. I'll never forget my first sight of those giant worms, and then vaping them for so offending my senses. It gave me quite the kick.

Let's frak these freaks up!

Putting aside the single player for a moment, Future Cop's multiplayer is deserving of a paragraph all to itself. Precinct Assault is the name of the game and the mission, take over the map by claiming gun turrets and subsidiary bases. Supporting you in this endeavour are helicopter gun ships, hover tanks, flying fortresses and the super heavy dreadnought tanks. The air units primarily defend your base while those on the ground  throw themselves headlong at the enemy defences. It's pretty sweet watching your swarm of helis cut an enemy tank push down to size and even better when it's your opponent in person. Of course, being a lonely child I had to satisfy myself with facing off against the computer's diabolical alter ego, Sky Captain! He was my nemesis, and worst of all had the ability to ply the sky while I trudged across the urban wastelands. To this day I still hear his cries of frustration and crows of victory. Damn him.

Fly my pretties, fly.

Moving onto lighter things, one of my favourite aspects of the game was always the cutscenes. I mean sure they were sometimes kind of childish, but given how seriously mainstream gaming seems to take itself these days a little levity is no bad thing. The voice acting was top notch as was the music, fitting in nicely with the aesthetic of the game. It has been criticised from time to time for it's cheesy dialogue, but I've always thought that part of the charm, much like the early Command and Conquer full motion videos. Hell, X1 even does a pretty sexy dance during the closing credits which I think is hard to beat.  Sadly I couldn't find a video of this online, so you'll have to settle for one badass pistol duel.

Don't mess with this warden.

Looking over Future Cop as a piece of gaming history it wasn't a trailblazer.  It didn't set the bar for mech games, primarily due to it's easy, pick up and play arcade feel. But what it was without doubt, was fun. Watching little sprite people explode in pixilated splatter and formidable war machines go up in smoke after your ministrations is extremely satisfying. It was just exceptionally well executed, from it's near flawless camera control to it's eclectic array of weaponry. There was nothing like dropping a plasma flare on somebody's head and watching it ruin their day. If only Windows 7 would run my beloved, I could do it all again.