Retro Rehash - Star Wars Republic Commando: Fragging Tinnies

Beneath my layers of cynicism, disappointment and burning resentment, I am and always will be, a Star Wars fan.  It's in my nature.  No matter how many half-arsed, poorly produced, badly written pieces of fierfek Lucas authorises I will stand firm, albeit embarrassed, by my universe.  It makes no sense really. It's the product of my inner fanatic, nay, my inner religiosity.  I've grown up with Star Wars and I'll be damned if I'll be run out of town by the blatant money grabbing which has come to epitomise everything about the series.  I mean, come on, Oshaka Tano?  Really George, do you hate us that much?  But on top of my blind adoration sits a nugget of hope that every once in a while still glints, is still capable of rousing my wounded loyalty.  A small gust of wind clears the ashes of so many cash ins and I can feel that Star Warsiness again.
             

Clear the way Delta.

In Star Wars: Republic Commando I found a respite from Jar Jar Binks, Anakin Skywalker, droids cracking wise and the oh dear god pain of it all.  In a sound choice, Lucasarts took this foray into the universe in a completely different direction, a grittier direction, than we have seen before.  Bypassing Jedi, Sith and the whole galactic wide shabang you are thrown into the fire that is the Clone Wars with nothing but your Decce, wits and three man team of elite Commandos.  Lead animator David Bogan said he wanted to "focus in on the military aspect of Star Wars," and I think he and his team did a pretty fine job.  From blasting doors, slicing terminals and altogether behaving like unstoppable badasses, you get to take the war to the Separatists like never before.  That isn't to say the game doesn't have it's flaws, but we can get to those later.
                   
Opening with the battle of Geonosis as seen in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones, you progress through three separate campaigns in varying locales.  Through the bowels of a ghost ship fighting off Trandoshian slaver scum, the lofty heights of the Wookie homeworld, Kashyyk and the droid foundries of Geonosis.  Each has it's own distinct flavour and never feels like a rehash of what's gone before.  It speaks volumes such detail was put into a genre that often suffers from the same tired and recycled scenery all executed with minimal effort.  Actually, the entire game enjoys a level of attention not seen in a Star Wars game since Knight's of the Old Republic, with everything from the sound to the command hud being designed to a tee.  Utilising Foley Sound, originally designed for film, Republic Commando specialises in bringing the whole package.  Creaking armour and the approach of enemies coincides with the visual presentation with natural precision.  Would you like to know more? Take a look below.

                                   

Sniper Rifles, AKA Precision Shotguns 

On the subject of realism, the command interface for your squad is deserving of special mention. Whether you're ordering your men to take firing positions to fend off a particularly nasty Sep ambush, or to slice a door for rapid entry, at no point did I feel handicapped by the system.  Using a collection of five keys you can keep your squad under control and firmly on the objective.  Thinking about it, my buddies Sev, Fixer and Scorch are probably the best NPC allies I've ever had, even having the nonce to beat off an attack before coming to rescue my sorry shebs.  On  many an occasion I found myself embarrassingly incapacitated and being chastised for my gung ho attitude while being revived.  It was a humbling experience being told off by an NPC that was actually right  for a change. It has to be said that Republic Commando isn't a game in which you can readily run and gun, but nor does it suffer the shame of cover-based game play.  You can order your men to take certain positions and you can feel free to shield yourself behind a wall, but don't for a second think you'll be cowering there for long.  It's all about the action baby.  With your Decce ion blaster and it's multiple attachments you'll be raising hell and fighting for your life.  Choosing which attachment to use in any given situation does require a bit of a knack. For instance, you'd better be saving those armour piercing grenades for the droid heavies and not wasting them on your bob standard battle variants, even if they do clear a room faster than a Nemoidian tax collector.  My personal favourite was the sniper attachment, packing one hell of a wallop and accuracy all in one neat package.

But just as the Republic are efficient and roll all their killing implements into one, the other races in the game possess their own unique styles and quirks.  The Trandoshians are projectile based, nasty and look like they've been put together with all the care and attention warranted in your average  Toydarian junk store.  Meanwhile the Geonosian beam weapon is a clicking, clacking, breakable looking thing that belays it's deadliness.  My only real complaint is that the basic Decce is unsuited for killing anything tougher than a battle droid with any ease and lacks the punch to stick it to heavier opponents.  So balls to the wall you'd better have a thermal detonator handy or it's lights out for Delta Squad.

Trandoshian Weaponry: Good as new with a slap of paint.

Having complimented the game to within an inch of worship there are a few problems that need addressing. First and most importantly of all, it feels a bit short.  I ran through it in about eight hours and while this is standard fair for a shooter I was kind of hoping that the Lucasarts team would have gone that extra parsec like they had throughout.  I was genuinely disappointed when I reached the end credits, although that could just be a sign of wanting more of a good thing.  Also, while the selection of weapons is eclectic it's not that vast, with about six pieces besides those which are attachments for your standard Decce.  This may seem a small gripe, but it would have been fun to really put those Commando skills to the test with a more blistering arsenal and customisable load out.
                     
So coming to the end Star Wars: Republic Commando is a first rate, standout shooter that does almost everything right.  The detail is truly fantastic and keeps the player immersed in a universe which seems genuinely alive, well until you start killing things.  It demonstrates that there is still mileage left in the Star Wars engine if the time and effort is invested properly, and not on anymore drivel that is meant to convince us Anakin Skywalker is Darth Vader.  Delta Squad are a fine addition to the universe fully deserving of their place in the lore, alongside Han Solo, the Death Star and even Jabba the Hutt.  As surely as Republic Commando deserves a place in your video game collection.

Movie Atrocities Of Yesteryear - Star Wars: The Clone Wars

I went into Star Wars: The Clone Wars prepared to bear the brunt of at least a modicum of disappointment. What you must understand is that as an avid fan of Lucas's grand creation I have weathered the fans discontent from The Phantom Menace, rose above the somewhat stilted acting and script of Attack of The Clones and found ultimate redemption in the semi-epic conclusion that is Revenge of The Sith. Like all movie franchises the series has had its flaws, its ups and downs, and sadly for this movie it is perhaps the furthest the saga has ever had to fall. George Lucas I beseech you, what in the name of Korriban were you thinking?

Don't we fans deserve a little respect? We've suffered enough

We open without the quintessential reel of story and instead are force fed a quick summary from some cantina layabout, who may or may not have once worked on one of the ill fated Starship Trooper sequels. Jabba's son has been kidnapped is the general jist of it and only the Jedi can possibly save him from the clutches of the evil Separatists. Ignoring the fact that nowhere else does this figment of imagination rear its damned ugly head, we as viewers are further insulted by the creature's name: Stinky. This is only a nickname mind you, who knows what you'd even call a baby Hutt, so I became rather resigned to it in the end.  It almost made me long for Jar Jar back, if only almost. The entire plot is centred around the rescue and quite frankly there's very little else to explain. Simply put:

If the Separatists win and return the son they stole they can use the Hutt Space lanes to help defeat the Republic.  Or, well you know the Republic does the same blasted thing but only to the Separatists. It's not a head scratcher. There are no, "I am your Father" style bombshells here.

Where's Order 66 when you need it?

However, I am getting ahead of myself and in so doing I am perhaps skating over the worst partnership in the history of film. Enter Anakin's (Matt Lanter) new Padawan; yes, I said Anakin's new Padawan, Ahsoka Tano (Ashley Eckstein). Given that almost the entire cast, minus the obviously confused Lee and Jackson, returned to voice their characters you would have thought that George might have felt the need to up the dialogue to a notch above dire, simple-minded-singular-sentences. But alas, no, and instead we are given witty banter between the two protagonists that boarders between redundant and woefully stupid. From stating the blindingly obvious to acting like an American brat lifted straight from High School Musical Thirteen, Ahsoka very quickly becomes the character you want to see Dooku soundly cleaving in two. By the end you'd probably pay your admission fee just to see a twenty second clip of the blessed event.

The bad guys themselves, Dooku and Assajj Ventress are nothing to write home about but do successfully put up a front of being evil without having to resort to pep rally bickering. The simple fact is that they are the anti Tano and Skywalker, which will immediately have you rooting for them if only to end your own suffering. But when you have to back the sadistic, and in Ventress's case psychotic, bad guy you know you're in trouble. For as much as we'd like not to admit it we all want to see the good guys win... Just not these good guys.

Something of a last stand situation?

In fairness the effects for the film are not that bad, although they don't touch the complexity or artful skill say, shown in  WALL-E. Actually there are a lot of things this film doesn't share with WALL-E, but the battle scenes are well rendered, adding some desperately needed weight to the flailing narrative. Obi Wan (James Arnold Taylor) actually delivers a passable Ewan McGregor impersonation, but once again the abysmal dialogue drops this small victory into the Rancor pit. After a while you do begin to wonder if the Jedi Master has perhaps meditated himself into a vegetative state; by the closing credits you very well may be hard pressed to remember your own name.

And there is one vital component that no Star Wars film can be found without, the musical score of John Williams who has successfully brought a consistent and vibrant feel to the series that is instantly recognisable as Star Wars. He made tiny Ewoks being blown to smithereens even sadder for Pete sake! The man quite simply is a genius. One however that is missing from The Clone Wars, and instead we are subjected to the guitar infused machinations of Kevin Kiner. Who seems upon realising he could not match Williams finesse struck off in another direction altogether, which quite frankly bombed faster than a Tie Fighter with an X-Wing up its rear end.

It does seem that this entire sordid affair need never have been brought into the light of day. In the end Star Wars fans are a picky bunch, they hated Phantom Menace as it could never live up to their expectations. So why did poor, dim George think that they could ever be sated by a teenage Disney padawan and her suddenly happy-peppy-none-dark- side-turning master? Honestly I don't have a clue and short of a well timed Jedi mind trick I doubt we ever will. This foray into the world of computer Star Wars animation should be consigned to the history books and preferably hidden from sight, if only to stop our children from judging us too harshly. So may the force be with you and watch your DVD's instead, as there's nothing more fun than watching the Death Star go boom, and pretending that The Clone Wars was a figment of your obviously over stimulated imagination.